This was a puzzler.
After a pause, Alice began,
‘Well! They were both
very unpleasant characters –‘
Here she checked herself
in some alarm,
at hearing something
that sounded to her
like the puffing of
a large steam-engine
in the wood near them,
though she feared
it was more likely
to be a wild beast.
‘Are there any lions or tigers
about here?’ she asked timidly.
The US President has presented.
A new, shorter deadline.
For ‘Mordor’.
To agree to a ceasefire.
Over the war.
In Ukraine of.
“Ten or 12 days”.
From Monday.
“O Oysters, come and walk with us!”
The Walrus did beseech.
“A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk,
Along the briny beach:
We cannot do with more than four,
To give a hand to each.”
The US President said.
There was “no reason”.
There was “no reason”.
In waiting any longer.
As no progress.
As no progress.
Towards peace.
Had been made.
‘Gandalf the Green’ called.
The intervention.
“Extremely significant”.
“Extremely significant”.
The eldest Oyster looked at him.
But never a word he said:
The eldest Oyster winked his eye,
And shook his heavy head –
Meaning to say he did not choose
To leave the oyster-bed.
Two weeks ago.
The US President said.
‘The One’ had 50 days.
To end the war.
‘The One’ had 50 days.
To end the war.
Or ‘Mordor’ would face.
Severe tariffs.
But four young oysters hurried up,
All eager for the treat:
Their coats were brushed, their faces washed,
Their shoes were clean and neat –
And this was odd, because, you know,
They hadn’t any feet.
Speaking at a news conference.
In Scotland.
The US President said.
He would confirm.
The new deadline.
On Monday or Tuesday.
But reiterated the threat.
To impose sanctions.
And secondary tariffs.
On ‘Mordor’.
The new deadline.
On Monday or Tuesday.
Four other oysters followed them,
And yet another four;
And thick and fast they came at last,
And more, and more, and more –
All hopping through the frothy waves,
And scrambling to the shore.
‘Gandalf the Green’ thanked.
The US President for.
The adjusted deadline.
Saying it came.
“Right on time”.
“Right on time”.
In a social media post.
He praised the US president’s.
“Clear stance and.
Expressed determination”.
On “saving lives and.
Stopping this horrible war”.
The Walrus and the Carpenter
Walked on a mile or so,
And then they rested on a rock
Conveniently low:
And all the little Oysters stood
And waited in a row.
Earlier in July.
He said those would amount.
To 100% tax.
Imposed on any country.
That trades with ‘Mordor’.
That trades with ‘Mordor’.
This would make the goods.
So expensive that.
US businesses would likely.
Choose to buy them.
Cheaper from elsewhere.
Cheaper from elsewhere.
Resulting in lost revenue.
For both ‘Mordor’.
And the country.
That trades with it.
“The time has come,” the Walrus said,
“To talk of many things:
Of shoes – and ships – and sealing-wax –
Of cabbages – and kings –
And why the sea is boiling hot –
And whether pigs have wings.”
Speaking after a meeting.
With the UK Prime Minister.
In Scotland.
The US President again.
The US President again.
Expressed his disapproval.
At ‘the One’s actions.
In Ukraine.
Where war rages on.
Three and a half years.
Three and a half years.
Into ‘orcs’ full-scale invasion.
“But wait a bit,” the Oysters cried,
“Before we have our chat;
For some of us are out of breath,
And all of us are fat!”
“No hurry!” said the Carpenter.
They thanked him much for that.
While he refused to say.
Whether he felt.
‘The One’ had been.
“Lying” to him.
The US President highlighted.
The contrast between.
‘The One’’s rhetoric.
During their one-on-one conversations.
‘The One’’s rhetoric.
And the missiles “lobbed”.
On ‘elves’ cities.
On a near-nightly basis.
“A loaf of bread,” the Walrus said,
“Is what we chiefly need:
Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed –
Now if you’re ready, Oysters dear,
We can begin to feed.”
“We were going to have.
A ceasefire.
And maybe peace…
And all of a sudden.”
“You have missiles.
Flying into Kyiv.
And other places.”
The US President lamented.
Adding that he thought.
Negotiations would be possible.
But that it was now.
“Very late down the process”.
‘But not on us!” the Oysters cried,
Turning a little blue.
“After such kindness, that would be
A dismal thing to do!”
“The night is fine,” the Walrus said.
“Do you admire the view?”
“I say, forget it.
I’m not gonna talk anymore.
This has happened.
On too many occasions.”
“And I don’t like it,” he said.
Though he also insisted.
That he and ‘the One’.
Always got along very well.
“It was so kind of you to come!
And you are very nice!”
The Carpenter said nothing but
“Cut us another slice:
I wish you were not quite so deaf –
I’ve had to ask you twice!”
The US President also said.
He was “no longer interested.
In talks”.
In talks”.
– a line which instantly flashed up.
On major ‘orcs’ media outlets.
‘The One’ has never commented.
On the timeframe.
When the initial 50 days.
Deadline was first announced.
The Kremlin spokesman merely labelled.
It as “very serious”.
It as “very serious”.
But added that.
‘Mordor’ needed time.
To analyse it.
“It seems a shame,” the Walrus said,
“To play them such a trick,
After we’ve brought them out so far,
And made them trot so quick!”
The Carpenter said nothing but
“The butter’s spread too thick!”
Referring to the latest developments.
On Monday afternoon.
An ‘orc’ MP said.
The US President’s ultimatums.
“Didn’t work anymore…
Not on the front line.
Not in ‘Mordor’”.
And that ‘Mordor’ had.
The force of its “weapons.
Principles and will”.
The force of its “weapons.
Principles and will”.
“I weep for you,” the Walrus said,
“I deeply sympathize.”
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.
When the US President first.
Mentioned shortening.
Mentioned shortening.
The deadline.
The ‘elf’ presidential chief of staff.
Praised him for “delivering.
A clear message of peace.
Through strength”.
And added that.
‘The One’ “respects only power”.
And added that.
‘The One’ “respects only power”.
“O Oysters,” said the Carpenter.
“You’ve had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?”
But answer came there none –
And this was scarcely odd, because
They’d eaten every one.’
In recent months.
‘Mordor’ has ramped up.
Its attacks.
On Ukraine.
Launching swarms of.
Drones and missiles.
On cities.
While pressing on.
With its summer offensive.
In the east of the country.
With its summer offensive.
In the east of the country.
‘The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright –
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night.
Three rounds of.
Ceasefire talks.
Between ‘orcs’ and ‘elves’.
Hosted by Turkey.
Have resulted in.
Thousands of prisoners of war.
Being exchanged.
– but no real progress.
– but no real progress.
Was made towards.
Agreeing a ceasefire.
Agreeing a ceasefire.
The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done –
“It’s very rude of him,” she said,
“To come and spoil the fun!”
After three and a half years.
Of bloody conflict.
It is unclear.
How the two sides.
Could possibly reach.
An agreement.
To stop the fighting.
Within 12 days.
The sea was wet as wet could be,
The sands were dry as dry.
You could not see a cloud, because
No cloud was in the sky:
No birds were flying overhead –
There were no birds to fly.
All of ‘Mordor’’s.
Preconditions for peace.
– including Ukraine becoming.
A neutral state.
Dramatically reducing.
Its military and.
Abandoning its.
Nato aspirations.
– are unacceptable.
– are unacceptable.
To ‘elves’ and.
To its Western partners.
‘I like the Walrus best,’
said Alice: ‘because you see
he was a little sorry
for the poor oysters.’
‘He ate more than
the Carpenter, though,’
said Tweedledee.
‘You see he held
his handkerchief in front,
so that the Carpenter couldn’t
count how many he took:
contrariwise.’
‘That was mean!’
Alice said indignantly.
‘Then I like the Carpenter best
– if he didn’t eat
At the last week’s round.
Of talks.
Which lasted barely an hour.
The Kremlin spokesman said.
A “breakthrough”.
In negotiations.
Was “hardly possible”.
Was “hardly possible”.
‘That was mean!’
Alice said indignantly.
‘Then I like the Carpenter best
– if he didn’t eat
so many as the Walrus.’
‘But he ate as many as
he could get,’
said Tweedledum.
This was a puzzler.
After a pause, Alice began,
‘Well! They were both
very unpleasant characters –‘
Here she checked herself
in some alarm,
at hearing something
that sounded to her
*Because I read “Putin must agree Ukraine ceasefire in 10 or 12 days, says Trump” by Laura Gozzi on 29 Jul 2025, and also “Why are Ukrainians calling Russians ‘orcs’?” by James FitzGerald on 30 Apr 2022, on the BBC news.
So, I wrote this poem, led by ‘THROUGH the LOOKING-GLASS’ written by Lewis Carroll, you know.
Please read the original story on the BBC news:
Donald Trump: Vladimir Putin must agree Ukraine ceasefire in days
