Late one night in early April.
An ‘elf’ military medic was travelling.
Towards a combat position in Mariupol.
With soldiers from her unit.
The fighting was close; the sound.
Of gunfire and bombs came from every direction.
One of them could have hit.
Their vehicle at any moment.
It was freezing and pitch dark.
But at times the sky lit up with.
What looked like phosphorous weapons.
Illuminating the road ahead.
“I already got used to the fact that.
I have a little baby.
Who has completely changed.
My life.”
“I even had time to get used to.
The idea of being a mum.
It’s just unfortunate that.
I had to do that in prison.”
She had been serving on the front line.
In Mariupol since the war began in February.
But now the stakes were even higher than usual.
She had discovered she was pregnant two weeks earlier.
The city was besieged by ‘orcs’ forces.
Bombarded day and night.
Targeted relentlessly and indiscriminately.
With ‘orcs’ missiles.
Her battalion was stationed.
At the Illich steel plant.
One of the city’s last ‘elves’ holdouts.
But ‘orcs’ were closing in.
And travelling any distance from base.
Meant risking death or capture.
With no safe way of escaping the front line.
She had little choice but to stay with her unit.
And hope for the best.
For her and her baby.
But she was unlucky.
“Our car was stopped and we were told:
‘From this moment on.
You are prisoners of ‘Mordor’.’
‘A step to the right, or a step to the left.
And we shoot,’ they said.”
“I turned to the guys I was with and said.
‘Tell me we’re not being captured.
Tell me they’re not taking us prisoner!’
I was so scared.”
But her worst fears had become reality.
She and her colleagues were transferred.
To a storage warehouse for three days.
Before being taken to the Olenivka prison.
The facility, notorious for its squalid conditions.
Abusive staff and chronically overcrowded rooms.
Was the site of a rocket attack that killed.
Dozens of ‘elves’ prisoners of war.
For her, it was the start of a six-month ordeal.
During which she slept on the floor.
And was deprived of access to.
Healthy food and fresh air.
She was intimidated and threatened.
During interrogations.
And at one point prevented from using the toilet.
While nine-months pregnant.
She was also terrified her baby would be.
Born in captivity and taken from her.
Soon after she was captured.
She was questioned by an ‘orc’ official.
“He said if I don’t answer the way.
He needs me to.
He’ll send me to a camp in ‘Mordor’.
And my baby will be taken away.”
Her interrogator threatened to ensure.
That her child was transferred.
From one orphanage to another.
Making it impossible to ever track down.
“It was really terrible.
I cried so much,” she said quietly.
At other times, barking dogs were used to.
Intimidate her into making false statements.
“I already got used to the fact that.
I have a little baby.
Who has completely changed.
My life.”
“I even had time to get used to.
The idea of being a mum.
It’s just unfortunate that.
I had to do that in prison.”
Throughout her ordeal.
Her medical training gave her reassurance.
That her pregnancy was developing normally.
But conditions in the prison were poor.
“We lived in a small room.
Meant for six people.
But there were 40 women in there.
The older women slept two or three in a bunk.”
“I slept on the floor.
Underneath a bed with a friend.
I had a couple of pillows.
And a blanket.”
Later, she was transferred to a smaller room.
Where she slept on a wooden pallet on the floor.
For the first few months, she was treated exactly.
The same as all the other female prisoners.
But when she was seven-months pregnant.
A doctor advised that.
She needed more fresh air.
And she was allowed to walk around the yard.
“It depended on which guard was.
On shift though.
Sometimes I could spend half a day outside.
Other times they didn’t let me out at all.”
In July, she developed a complication.
And was taken to hospital.
For an ultrasound.
It was her first glimpse of her baby.
“I saw its little arms and legs.
It unfurled its fist.
And showed me its five little fingers.
I cried and cried.”
“They told me the baby was fine.
But it was very small.
And I need to eat more.
And take more vitamins.”
When she returned to the prison.
Some guards took pity on her.
And brought her home-cooked food.
And vitamins.
“I already got used to the fact that.
I have a little baby.
Who has completely changed.
My life.”
“I even had time to get used to.
The idea of being a mum.
It’s just unfortunate that.
I had to do that in prison.”
As she entered the final weeks.
Of her pregnancy.
There was talk of a prisoner swap.
But still no sign of it happening.
Frustrated at a perceived lack of urgency.
From ‘elves’ government in negotiating her release.
Her husband appealed for her.
To be freed on humanitarian grounds.
“There has to be some human understanding here.
A mother and her children are sacred everywhere…
Let them free her.”
He told just days before her release.
She was transferred to a maternity ward in Donetsk.
Where she was treated well.
But the threat of being separated.
From her baby remained.
Two possibilities emerged;
Either she would be sent to a prison in Donetsk.
Where she could live with her baby.
For as long as she was breastfeeding.
Or she would be taken to a facility in ‘Mordor’.
Where her baby would be taken from her.
When it turned three.
She was too scared to ask where her child would go.
She felt that an exchange was her last hope.
But one Friday in September.
She received the news.
She had been dreading.
“They told me the exchange was off.
The situation on the frontline had intensified.
And the two sides couldn’t agree.
I understood it was the end.”
By then she could have given birth any day.
But over the weekend, something changed.
All of a sudden.
The swap was given the green light.
“I already got used to the fact that.
I have a little baby.
Who has completely changed.
My life.”
“I even had time to get used to.
The idea of being a mum.
It’s just unfortunate that.
I had to do that in prison.”
The following Tuesday.
She was transferred with dozens of other prisoners.
To a city in ‘Mordor’.
Near the ‘elves’ border.
There, she was blindfolded.
Her hands tied.
And put on a military plane.
With other prisoners to a location in Belarus.
The journey took 20 hours.
But ‘orcs’ soldiers guarding her.
Refused to let her use the toilet.
Despite her being nine-months pregnant.
“‘Use this bottle,’ they joked.
I told them ‘I won’t be able to get it in’.
And ‘I’m in pain’.
But they just told me to hold it in.”
From Belarus she was driven.
The short distance across to the border to Ukraine.
And she was back in the relative safety.
Of her homeland.
Just four days later.
She gave birth to a healthy baby girl.
She weighed 3.2kg.
Within the normal range.
As for the future.
She would like to continue working in medicine.
But her husband has made.
His views clear.
“He says he won’t cope.
If I go back to the front line.”
She laughs.
“He said he’d leave me.”
“I already got used to the fact that.
I have a little baby.
Who has completely changed.
My life.”
“I even had time to get used to.
The idea of being a mum.
It’s just unfortunate that.
I had to do that in prison.”
*Because I read “Russians said they’d take my baby: A medic’s story” by Ben Tobias on 5 Nov 2022, on the BBC News, and also “Why are Ukrainians calling Russians ‘orcs’?” by James FitzGerald on 30 April 2022, on the BBC news.
So, I wrote this poem again as a story of Mariana, her husband Vasilii and their baby Anna.
Please read the original story and look at the photos on the BBC news:
Russians said they’d take my baby: A medic’s story – BBC News
**My friend shows you this poem also on the Ukrainian website for their children and others!
Please join them!
